“I can't expose myself by saying, ‘Wow, I have intrusive thoughts.’ I just want to make something that matters, something that I gravitate towards, which is honesty and stuff that feels real.” That vulnerability feels obvious to her - why hide what we all feel? “I have this theory that you can't expose a human being emotionally because we have the same emotions,” Marie says. So she names them, taking away their power. The Finneas-produced “Serotonin” examines how terrified she is of her intrusive thoughts, the corners of her mind.
In her, Marie found a kindred spirit of sorts, in the sense that they both have things they’re running from. “Rue,” a 2020 single that’s on the album, was inspired by Zendaya’s character in Euphoria. It’s this willingness to reckon with inexplicable sadness, heightened emotion, and the moving states of her mental health on a given day that make a signature girl in red song. “I've been through hell, but I’m on my way out.” “I could die here and nobody would know,” the lyrics go. The place where light can come in too, through the cracks in the wall. It’s the place where you lay on the floor and aren’t sure you can get up. “It’s been a place I've hated and it's been a place I've loved, and it's been a place where I've been able to reflect on everything that's been happening mentally and in my life,” she says. It’s why she’s concerned with creating safe feelings for herself, in the form of the instruments, books, and knick-knacks that decorate her space. The home is a center for her, a place where the best and worst moments of life are lived. It’s a gut-punch of a song, a complex world of experiences and emotions distilled down to her bedroom. The distance from both home and touring travel seems to have allowed her to capture feelings from both, whether it’s a lonely New York City hotel room or her Oslo apartment. She recorded the album in the picturesque city of Bergen with producer Matias Tellez, which is where she spent the majority of 2020.
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